Catholic Faith Refresher Course

"Marriage honorable in all, and the bed undefiled." (Hebrews 13:4)

 
DIRECTIONS TO THE STUDENT       Marriage difficulties are the biggest reason why new Catholics fall away from the Church. Sometimes these difficulties start with a poor understanding of the state and Sacrament of Marriage. Unfortunately, too many Americans have no code of marriage morality except the lax laws of the government. In this fIrst lesson on marriage you will learn one important thing: GOD MADE MARRIAGE AND THE LAWS OF MARRIAGE. You must convince yourself that your principles of marriage from now on will be the laws of God and not the laws of man. You will not be a Christian unless you clearly realize that the marriage morality of many people around you is very wrong. After you study this lesson, you must destroy any false ideas you have about divorce and other evils.

A. INTRODUCTION

Suppose tonight as you kneel down to say your night prayers an angel appears to you. The angel tells you God is going to give you a great power, the power of giving life back to the dead. How carefully you would have to use this power!

B.  THE POWER OF PARENTHOOD    God has actually given you a greater power: the power of giving life for the fIrst time, the power of becoming a parent. Husband and wife cooperate with God in the creation of a new person. They share in the same power by which God created the world.

C. PARENTHOOD IS A SACRED POWER

There is nothing dirty or shameful about the sexual power in man. It becomes dirty and shameful- sinful- when misused or abused. This sacred power gave us the Blessed Virgin Mary .Her mother and father performed the sacred marriage act and the result of that act was the conception of the Virgin Mary.

D.  GOD MADE MARRIAGE, GOVERNMENTS DID NOT MAKE MARRIAGE

When God created Adam and Eve, He made them husband and wife. " Male and female he created them. And God blessed them. saying: Increase and multiply, andfill the earth.'. (Genesis I :27-28)

There were no lawyers or judges then. MARRIAGE WAS NOT MADE BY THE GOVERNMENT .We must go to God to learn about marriage and the laws of marriage.

E. THE FIRST PURPOSE OF MARRIAGE IS CHILDREN

The Bible says the first and main purpose of marriage is children. "Increase and multiply." (Genesis 1 :28) .'I will. therefore, that the younger should marry , bear children, be mistresses of families. ..(1 Timothy 5: 14)

Common sense teaches the same truth -the purpose of marriage is children. There is a difference in the male and the female body. The man's body is tall and strong so that he can protect his family and provide food, clothing and shelter. The woman's body is delicate and made to bear and nurse children.

There is a difference in the male and female nature. The man's nature is colder more logical. The woman is more gentle. more sympathetic, patient. emotional. She needs these qualities to raise her children. She is made to be a mother. A man by his nature could not equal the generosity and self sacrifice for children that a woman has as a mother.

F. THE SECOND PURPOSE OF MARRIAGE IS MUTUAL LOVE AND HELP OF HUSBAND AND WIFE          

The Bible teaches us that the second purpose of marriage is mutual love and help. ., And the Lord God said: It is not good for man to be alone, let us make him a help like unto himself ...for Adam there was not found a helper like himself ...and the Lord God built the rib which he took from Adam into a woman: and brought her to Adam." (Genesis 2:18-20-22) Common sense teaches us that the second purpose of marriage is mutual love and help. In a way a man is incomplete without a wife. 

And a wife can best give these to her husband. In a way, a woman too is incomplete without a husband; she finds it hard to bear loneliness; she needs affection, attention, and companionship; she needs someone on whom to depend.

Man and woman find their completion in marriage. Notice how an old couple depend on one another.

G.  THE REASON FOR SEX PLEASURE

The God-given purpose of the sex pleasure is primarily to attract husband and wife to have children. There are difficulties in having children -the expense, the restriction of your freedo, and the need of patience. God placed a very great pleasure in the very organs by which children are conceived. As God knew that people wouldn't eat if everything tasted like cardboard. So He placed a great pleasure in the organs with which we eat in order to attract us to eat. Sex pleasure exists first of all to attract husband and wife to continue the life of the human race, just as pleasure of taste exists first of all to attract us to continue the life of the body. The secondary or minor purpose of the sex pleasure is to foster and deepen mutual love between husband and wife. The pleasure experienced comes as a secondary purpose for marriage. If a man and woman place the pleasure of sex before the responsibilities of the sexual act, then they rearrange the plan of God, placing the wrong purpose for sex in the first place. When this is done, then the couple can easily justify any method of birth control --even abortion --because they place pleasure ahead of responsibility.

H. THE RIGHT USE OF SEX

Only a husband and wife who are validly married may use the power of sex. All use of sex outside of marriage is a mortal sin, because the reason for sex is so sacred, namely to attract husband and wife to bring new life into the world. "Now the works of the flesh are manifest: which are fornication, uncleanness, immodesty, luxury, ...they who do such things shall not obtain the kingdom of God." (Galatians 5: 19-21 )

I.  ONE MAN AND ONE WOMAN    God created only one wife for Adam and only one husband for Eve. This was to be the model marriage for all time. If God wanted to create a dozen wives for Adam, He could have done so, but it did not fit into the nature of man as created by God. Note that when God made the laws for marriage, there were no courts, no lawyers, just God and Adam and Eve. Marriage and the laws of marriage come from God, not from the Government. The natural law and the laws of the Church are God's laws concerning marriage. AIl Catholics are bound to observe them.

J.  UNTIL DEATH   Husband and wife are married until death. No words of a priest could be so clear and definite as the words of the Bible. " A woman is bound by the law as long as her husband liveth : but if her husband die she is at liberty .Let her marry to whom she will: only in the Lord." (I Corinthians 7:39)

"But from the beginning of the creation, God made them male and female. For this cause a man shall leave his father and mother and shall cleave to his wife. And they two shall be in one flesh. Therefore now they are not two, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together ,let no man put asunder. ..Whosever shall put away his wife and marry another committeth adultery against her. And if the wife shall put away her husband and be married to another, she committeth adultery." (Mark 10:6-12)

"For the woman that hath an husband, whilst her husband liveth is bound to the law. Therefore, whilst her husband liveth, she shall be called an adulteress, if she be with another man: but if her husband be dead, she is delivered from the law of her husband; so that she is not an adulteress, if she be with another man." (Romans 7:2-3)

" But to them that are married, not I, but the Lord, commandeth that the wife depart not from her husband. And if she depart, that she remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And let not the husband put away his wife." (I Corinthians 10:11 )

God wants husbands and wives to stay together until death, because a mother cannot raise her children properly without a husband's help and support. One of the greatest evils afflicting society today is the division of families due to divorce.

Animals mature quickly; the instinct for animal parents to stay together ceases to function when the young offspring are able to take care of themselves. Human children are not able to live apart from their parents until they are about twenty-one years old. That means that human parents have to stay together for at least twenty or thirty years. By that time, they are fifty or sixty years old- and this is a lifetime. To make sure that they would stay together that long God made a law that they must stay together until death.

K. GOD MADE NO EXCEPTIONS

God does not permit even childless couples to break the marriage bond, because He knew that if He made only one exception people would find all kinds of excuses. God made no exception because He knew that if couples entered marriage with the idea that they could separate if the marriage didn 't work out, they wouldn't try to solve their difficulties. Experience proves this.

L. GOD'S LAWS ARE FOR THE COMMON GOOD

God made His laws for the common good of all men. But every law sometimes causes hardship for an individual. For example--speed limits! So also God's laws on marriage cause hardship for some couples. But remember that God did not make these laws blindly; He foresaw the difficulties they would cause for some couples; still He had His own good reasons for making His marriage laws binding on these couples too. He made these laws and demands that they be obeyed.

M. GOD'S RECIPE FOR HAPPINESS  This is God's recipe for happiness in marriage: the first purpose of marriage is children; the second purpose is mutual love and help. Sex pleasure is made for these two purposes. One man and one woman until death is the law, add plenty of prayer, common sense and unselfishness to your married life. If you follow God's recipe, you can expect the greatest measure of happiness possible on this earth. If you do not follow Gad's law, you have a mess.

N. THE CONDITION OF MARRIAGE AT THE TIME OF CHRIST

For the most part the beauty and holiness of marriage was destroyed because man changed God's plan to suit his own selfish desires. Sexual pleasure was worshipped; children were not wanted; mothers often killed their unborn babies; babies were left on garbage piles to die of exposure. And the police could not put the parents in jail for these crimes.

The woman was her husband's slave, a plaything, someone to satisfy his sexual desires, someone to take care of any children that might be born. Women were bought and sold like cattle. A husband could exchange his wife for another, could kill her if he wanted to do so and the police could not put him in jail.

O. BIBLICAL DESCRIPTION OF MARRIAGE CONDITIONS AT THE TIME OF CHRIST  
 A Saviour was needed badly. The Bible tells us of the terrible condition of marriage before Christ came. "They became vain in their thoughts. And their foolish heart was darkened. ..Wherefore, God gave them up to the desires of their heart unto uncleaness: to dishonor their own bodies among themselves. ..God delivered them up to shameful affections. F or their women have changed the natural use into that use which is against nature. And, in like manner, the men also. leaving the natural use of the women, have burned in their lusts, one towards another: men with men, working that which is filthy and receiving in themselves the recompense which was due to their error.'. (Romans 1 :21-24-26-27)

P. CHRIST BROUGHT BACK GOD'S PLAN

The sacredness of marriage was restored by the God-man Jesus Christ Christ condemned those who broke God's laws on marriage. He raised marriage to the dignity of a Sacrament He placed marriage on the same level as Baptism, Holy Communion and the other Sacraments. He made marriage a source of grace.

Q. WHAT JESUS CHRIST DID FOR THE FAMIL Y

Christ held up His own Family as the model. He made Mary the model of all Christian women, wives, and mothers. He made Joseph the model of all Christian men, husbands, and fathers. Jesus was the model of all Christian children. The Apostoles preached this model to the pagans. The Catholic Church changed the sex attitudes and habits of nations, and gained a great victory over the evil lusts of the flesh. Families following these Christian examples contribute the greatest benefits to society.

R. THE CHRISTIAN FAMILY CAME WITH THE CATHOLIC CHURCH
The Catholic Church gave the world the Christian family. Real happiness came to all who followed God's plan. A husband loved and respected his wife. He supported his family and gave good example to his children. His wife could trust him when he was away from home. The Christian wife was a woman respected and loved by all, a queen in her household. She took care of her husband and her children. The children of the Christian family respected the authority of their parents; they obeyed their parents as Jesus obeyed Mary and Joseph. The nations of the world bowed to the laws of Christ and became Catholic; they accepted God's plan for marriage. This is the history of Christian marriage until the sixteenth century.

S. HENRY VIII

Henry VIII, King of England, was Catholic and married a Catholic. He asked the Pope to let him divorce his wife and marry Anne Boleyn. The Pope told him this was impossible. Henry broke away from the Catholic Church and started his own church. He made himself head of the new church. Then he granted himself a divorce and married Anne.

T. DIVORCE COMES TO THE U.S.A.

Various unchristian influences in the United States have made it possible for an American to get a decree of divorce from the civil courts. Many Americans are now reared in an atmosphere that approves divorce and remarriage after divorce. Actually the Government and the civil courts have no power to break a valid marriage. A valid marriage contract binds man and wife even after a civil court grants a decree of divorce. God made marriage and the laws of marriage.

U. THE CATHOLIC CHURCH ALONE STANDS FOR THE SACREDNESS OF MARRIAGE

Because of God's law, the Pope couldn't give Henry VIII a divorce even though he foresaw that all of England would go Protestant. The Church cannot back down on God's Laws even to let you enter the Church. It's very difficult to convince Americans that divorce, birth control, and so forth, are wrong, and that God's laws on marriage must be obeyed.

V. THE CONDITION OF MARRIAGE TODAY   
 Now marriage is almost as it was before the coming of Jesus. Divorce is accepted as normal. Marry as often as you want; there is no shame to it- but really it is legalized adultery. From divorce come thousands of broken homes. Another evil accepted today is birth control. People want the pleasure of sex, but not the children. Children are too much trouble, too expensive. People want costly vacations, expensive cars, electronic conveniences, liquor, and so forth. They want to be free from care and responsibility. And abortion, the killing of an unborn child, is cold-blooded murder. Just think of the large number of abortions in this country! Even when performed legally by doctors, they are legalized murder.

Today pregnancy is often considered shameful. Motherhood the crowning glory of women, is laughed at, sneered at, considered ignorant. Large families are often the subject of jokes. Even unfaithfulness does not produce shame. Consider your own reaction to the adultery of movies.  Pagan morality describes the marriage conduct of many Americans. This is to say nothing of the moral shame to be found in unmarried couples living together, as well as the laxity in our opinions regarding homosexuality.

On the other hand we have millions of fine people living up to the laws of God. Practical Catholics marry once and remain married for life. There are many, many families who remain together unaffected by divorce.

W.  THE FUTURE OF THE U.S.A.

The foundation of a nation is the family. When the foundation is weak, the whole structure falls. Family life in America is gradually being destroyed, because of divorce, separation and other pagan practices. Even though today we are the greatest nation on earth, three hundred years from now we might not even exist: just as Rome fell, we also may fall like a house built on sand because our foundation was weak.

X. YOUR MARRIAGE

Perhaps your life has been "fouled up"by a wrecked marriage If so, don't quit coming to these insttuctions Let us pick up the pieces and try to patch up your life. Don't try to make a decision on your marriage case: you haven't had the training. Let the priest in charge of you try to figure it out for you. Tell him the whole story.

QUESTIONS FOR REVIEW 

1.   What is the Sacrament of Holy Orders?

2.   Who made marriage?

3.   What is a priest?

4.   Who made the laws and purpose of marriage?

5.   Was Jesus Christ a priest?

6.   What are the purposes of marriage?

7.   Who were the first Catholic priests?

8.   What are the two principal laws of marriage?

9.   What are the principal powers your parish priest has?